Season 37, Episode 13
SNL has had its odd choices of host over the years, those people that you just hear about and go “Really? That person? They'll be terrible.” Channing Tatum is one of those people. Frankly, I'm still astounded that his career has taken off as it has, given that his incredibly wooden acting style. He's only moderately successful when given the chance to send up his lunkhead public image, and even SNL can't trade on that skill for an entire episode. So tonight's going to make for an interesting, and most likely painful, experience.
Cold Open- Newt Gingrich, Moon President: Three weeks off, and the show comes back swinging for it's opening political sketch. Granted, the bar has been set pretty low by the past few years of political cold opens, so I'm not going to say that this was a classic, or hold up to the show's better political sketches of the 90s. However, these three weeks off have given the show a lot material to play with, thanks to Newt's time in the spotlight, and with so many different jokes, it's didn't feel as if the show was hitting one note over and over. Even better was that was a high concept sketch, something we rarely see here, and that change alone helped to add a bit of freshness.
Monologue: Well, isn't somebody chipper this evening? Maybe Tatum won't be such a drag on this episode. Except for the fact that this monologue wasn't all that funny. I'm actually not sure how much of that is Tatum's fault – he gave it his all, and frankly male stripper jokes just aren't all that funny, nor are SNL monologues that seek to mock the host's past. Plus, once he started going through his past clients, you just knew that a man would show up eventually.
(Oh Lord, we jump from that monologue to an ad for The Vow. This is just going to be one of those nights, isn't it?)
It's Getting Freaky with Cee-Lo Green: Okay now this? This is better, in so many ways. As I wrote about last time, this is a sketch that is still finding it's legs, as there are a lot of good random elements, but has yet to make it weird enough or find a way to make a cohesive whole out of all these elements, and that was again the case here. But what really surprised me was Tatum's turn as Matthew McConaughey, which certainly wasn't the best that I've seen, but was better than I expected. He added enough skeeviness to the portrayal to jive well with the general craziness of the sketch.
Downton Abbey on Spike: Yes, Downton Abbey jokes are tired. So are “Spike is the network for douchebags” jokes. But somehow putting them together, where the the low-brow meets the high-brow, and at a very quick pace, made it work, and jokes piled on top of one another in a glorious combination. I'm not sure if this is a sketch that would work for those who haven't seen Downton – and if you haven't, what's wrong with you? - but it certainly made this fan laugh quite a bit.
Superbowl Promo: This is one of those sketches that doesn't seem to know where it's joke lies. Is it watching all the sportscasters do the super-slow head raise? Seeing them sprout non-sequiters between takes? And just why were they doing that exactly? This was a sketch that probably could have used some more time in the writers' room. (I did however, laugh at the last punch line, with the wasted sportscasters appearing in the promo against Brian Williams.)
(And we're following that Vow ad with one for 21 Jump Street. The show is just forcing Tatum down our throats.)
Secret Word: Why? Why do they keep doing this to us? Why does Wiig keep agreeing to these? She's better than this, and she has to star power to reject these.
Weekend Update: In addition to Seth Meyers doing his usual shtick, we got....Guy Fieri, who I still don't find funny overall, but actually managed to get few good lines in, like the Madonna gag, and the weirdly specific ingredients of the toilet bowl dip....And then there was the incredibly toothless send-up of Lana Del Ray's performance on the show. Or rather, it was a send-up of the backlash, which essentially just mounted to the show defending asking her on the show in the first place. And there are few things less funny that being defensive.
Bat Mitzvah: Okay, with this one, I recognized the joke – the contrast between the mother approved dance move, and those added by the older sister – but really? Teens doing some dirty (and in other cases, not dirty at all) is an old joke, so old in fact that it should have died years ago.
Tom Brady at Ruby Tuesdays: So a far girl walks into a bar....I mean really, how many times has SNL pulled out he old “older woman hits on, and eventually seduces a much younger, handsome man” chestnut? In fact, so much of this sketch was perfunctory, that the sketch didn't even bother building up to the change in Tom Brady's mind; it just sort of happened. That the sketch followed it up with one of those odd left turns of an ending – another recurring element that I hate – didn't help matters.
Go-Techs Flex: At this point, I feel like I'm just pointing out all the tired jokes in sketched, because what else is there for me to do, right? So....Complicated exercise equipment! Poorly made infomercials! Ditzy blondes! Yeah, that's about it.
Bongo's Clown Room: Yeah, I remember this sketch. A bunch of weird one-liners/strippers, which are only fitfully funny, and none of which form a cohesive whole. And man, did it just drag on and on and on. Why did they decided to bring this one back is beyond me. Oh right, because Channing Tatum used to be a stripper, and isn't that just hilarious?
Goodnights: Somebody probably should have told Tatum that actual shotouts during this portion of the show just are no apropos.
Okay, I guess I should apologize to Channing Tatum – he definitely wasn't the worse thing about this episode, and I rarely felt as if he was dragging down any individual sketch. Instead, most of the sketched were brought down by trite and overused premises, none of which went anywhere good. And to think, the improved political cold open had me believing that things were going to look up tonight.
Best Sketch – Downton Abbey on Spike
Worst Sketch – Tom Brady at Ruby Tuesdays
Next Week: Zooey Deschanel test the show's ability from using the word “adorkable”, and we get to meet somebody named Harmin
Quotes, Etc.:
“Not all of America is as forward-thinking as South Carolina.”
“If you'll excuse me, I'll go back to exploring craters.”
“Are you my robot father?”
“Also, when I said craters earlier, I meant ladies' butts.”
“My name is Cee-Lo, and I'm a little bald chocolate gummy bear.”
“The next day I found a minnow in me belly button.”
“I look like somebody put pimp clothes on a koala bear.”
“Hello, I'm Colonel Nasty, and I will do my very best to help you with your lesbian sexual conundrum.”
“Hot! Way Hot!....The Other One!”
“Oh wait, his other car IS a bike!”
“Oh, she head that. You just pissed off the chicken lady.”
“Donald Trump endorsed Newt Gingrich by endorsing Mitt Romney.”
“The next one is called 'The Madonna”, and it's just a weird bucket of muscles.”
“Two lobsters who do not get along...”
“Because it's getting harder and harder for Jesus to carrying you one the beach.”
“And all those 13's are bad luck for the mother's vagina.”
“The only one he hasn't maestered...is the game of life.”
“I once swallowed an open safety pin, but pooped out a perfectly closed one, that was weird.”
“My nephew does not have ADHD – he's just a dickhead.”
Monologue: Well, isn't somebody chipper this evening? Maybe Tatum won't be such a drag on this episode. Except for the fact that this monologue wasn't all that funny. I'm actually not sure how much of that is Tatum's fault – he gave it his all, and frankly male stripper jokes just aren't all that funny, nor are SNL monologues that seek to mock the host's past. Plus, once he started going through his past clients, you just knew that a man would show up eventually.
(Oh Lord, we jump from that monologue to an ad for The Vow. This is just going to be one of those nights, isn't it?)
It's Getting Freaky with Cee-Lo Green: Okay now this? This is better, in so many ways. As I wrote about last time, this is a sketch that is still finding it's legs, as there are a lot of good random elements, but has yet to make it weird enough or find a way to make a cohesive whole out of all these elements, and that was again the case here. But what really surprised me was Tatum's turn as Matthew McConaughey, which certainly wasn't the best that I've seen, but was better than I expected. He added enough skeeviness to the portrayal to jive well with the general craziness of the sketch.
Downton Abbey on Spike: Yes, Downton Abbey jokes are tired. So are “Spike is the network for douchebags” jokes. But somehow putting them together, where the the low-brow meets the high-brow, and at a very quick pace, made it work, and jokes piled on top of one another in a glorious combination. I'm not sure if this is a sketch that would work for those who haven't seen Downton – and if you haven't, what's wrong with you? - but it certainly made this fan laugh quite a bit.
Superbowl Promo: This is one of those sketches that doesn't seem to know where it's joke lies. Is it watching all the sportscasters do the super-slow head raise? Seeing them sprout non-sequiters between takes? And just why were they doing that exactly? This was a sketch that probably could have used some more time in the writers' room. (I did however, laugh at the last punch line, with the wasted sportscasters appearing in the promo against Brian Williams.)
(And we're following that Vow ad with one for 21 Jump Street. The show is just forcing Tatum down our throats.)
Secret Word: Why? Why do they keep doing this to us? Why does Wiig keep agreeing to these? She's better than this, and she has to star power to reject these.
Weekend Update: In addition to Seth Meyers doing his usual shtick, we got....Guy Fieri, who I still don't find funny overall, but actually managed to get few good lines in, like the Madonna gag, and the weirdly specific ingredients of the toilet bowl dip....And then there was the incredibly toothless send-up of Lana Del Ray's performance on the show. Or rather, it was a send-up of the backlash, which essentially just mounted to the show defending asking her on the show in the first place. And there are few things less funny that being defensive.
Bat Mitzvah: Okay, with this one, I recognized the joke – the contrast between the mother approved dance move, and those added by the older sister – but really? Teens doing some dirty (and in other cases, not dirty at all) is an old joke, so old in fact that it should have died years ago.
Tom Brady at Ruby Tuesdays: So a far girl walks into a bar....I mean really, how many times has SNL pulled out he old “older woman hits on, and eventually seduces a much younger, handsome man” chestnut? In fact, so much of this sketch was perfunctory, that the sketch didn't even bother building up to the change in Tom Brady's mind; it just sort of happened. That the sketch followed it up with one of those odd left turns of an ending – another recurring element that I hate – didn't help matters.
Go-Techs Flex: At this point, I feel like I'm just pointing out all the tired jokes in sketched, because what else is there for me to do, right? So....Complicated exercise equipment! Poorly made infomercials! Ditzy blondes! Yeah, that's about it.
Bongo's Clown Room: Yeah, I remember this sketch. A bunch of weird one-liners/strippers, which are only fitfully funny, and none of which form a cohesive whole. And man, did it just drag on and on and on. Why did they decided to bring this one back is beyond me. Oh right, because Channing Tatum used to be a stripper, and isn't that just hilarious?
Goodnights: Somebody probably should have told Tatum that actual shotouts during this portion of the show just are no apropos.
Okay, I guess I should apologize to Channing Tatum – he definitely wasn't the worse thing about this episode, and I rarely felt as if he was dragging down any individual sketch. Instead, most of the sketched were brought down by trite and overused premises, none of which went anywhere good. And to think, the improved political cold open had me believing that things were going to look up tonight.
Best Sketch – Downton Abbey on Spike
Worst Sketch – Tom Brady at Ruby Tuesdays
Next Week: Zooey Deschanel test the show's ability from using the word “adorkable”, and we get to meet somebody named Harmin
Quotes, Etc.:
“Not all of America is as forward-thinking as South Carolina.”
“If you'll excuse me, I'll go back to exploring craters.”
“Are you my robot father?”
“Also, when I said craters earlier, I meant ladies' butts.”
“My name is Cee-Lo, and I'm a little bald chocolate gummy bear.”
“The next day I found a minnow in me belly button.”
“I look like somebody put pimp clothes on a koala bear.”
“Hello, I'm Colonel Nasty, and I will do my very best to help you with your lesbian sexual conundrum.”
“Hot! Way Hot!....The Other One!”
“Oh wait, his other car IS a bike!”
“Oh, she head that. You just pissed off the chicken lady.”
“Donald Trump endorsed Newt Gingrich by endorsing Mitt Romney.”
“The next one is called 'The Madonna”, and it's just a weird bucket of muscles.”
“Two lobsters who do not get along...”
“Because it's getting harder and harder for Jesus to carrying you one the beach.”
“And all those 13's are bad luck for the mother's vagina.”
“The only one he hasn't maestered...is the game of life.”
“I once swallowed an open safety pin, but pooped out a perfectly closed one, that was weird.”
“My nephew does not have ADHD – he's just a dickhead.”
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